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  I watched as she left and wondered if she was telling the truth. I certainly hoped so, because things would be awkward for the rest of the weekend if she wasn't. I waited to give her the time necessary to get to her room and then I headed for mine. As dumb as my actions may have been, they did do one good thing. I felt relaxed and my mind cleared. Maybe I'd actually be able to sleep tonight.

  Chapter 4

  I managed to sleep for nearly seven solid hours, no dreams, no disturbances. The closest I came to a disturbance was when I finally woke, pulled out of my sleep by the squeaking of bed springs and the unmistakable sounds of two people fucking.

  I lay there, still half asleep, and hoped I was hearing Abby and Don because I really didn't want my sister to be the one making all of that noise. I knew she was having sex with her boyfriend, but knowing it and hearing it were two completely different things.

  I got up and headed for the bathroom before any of the others remembered there was one down here too. By the time I got out, I heard them all in the kitchen, laughing and talking. Then I smelled bacon and smiled. Suzette may have grown up in a house where a cook made most of the meals, but she'd always been in the kitchen, wanting to help. Of all the things people found surprising about my sister, her ability to cook was usually near the top of the list.

  When I headed into the kitchen, part of me was worried that Denise would be there, acting weird or clingy. As much as I'd enjoyed the sex, I was starting to regret it. A couple minutes of pleasure – well, more than a couple – wouldn’t be worth a weekend of fending off advances or explaining to Denise why last night had been a one-time thing. Or, worse, having to tell Suzette why her friend was pissed at me.

  “Morning!” Suzette called from where she stood at the stove. She waved the spatula at me. “There's bacon, pancakes and scrambled eggs over on the counter.” She made a face. “And Matt made some sort of kale smoothie thing if you'd prefer that.”

  “I'm training for the Boston Marathon,” he told me as he leaned against the counter and stared at my sister's ass.

  “We're all going to go cheer him on,” Abby said. “You should totally come with us.”

  “Knowing my workaholic brother, he'll have some software emergency.” Suzette grinned at me. “He's just a big computer geek, after all, preferring to spend his time in front of screen rather than with real people.”

  With all of the affection a big brother could muster, I flipped her off. She laughed and returned the gesture.

  “There's like, what, six years between the two of you?” Misty asked from where she sat at the table, nibbling on a piece of bacon. I knew it was her because I could see the 'M' charm on her necklace.

  “Six and a half,” Suzette answered. “But he didn't come to live with our dad until he was older.”

  “I'm surprised you're so close,” Don spoke up. “I have a step-brother who's five years younger than me and we pretty much see each other at holidays and only sometimes.”

  I shrugged. “You know how it is with Suze. She gets her way.”

  “I do,” she agreed. “And I decided that I wanted my big brother around. Lucky for him, I let him stay.”

  It was time to steer the discussion away from me before anyone could ask even more personal questions. Like why I'd agreed to come this weekend or what I'd been doing last night.

  “What are the plans for today?” I piled food on my plate and headed over to the table. As I passed Denise, I risked a glance. She smiled at me, but it wasn't anything more or less special than it had been yesterday. If anything, there was less to it than there had been before. Friendly, but the lust was more tempered.

  “We're all going to head over to the Vail Ski Resort,” Kristy said as she sat down next to me. “You're coming, right?”

  “We have perfectly good trails here to ski on,” I said as I reached for the maple syrup.

  “We're not going for just the trails,” Abby said. “There's shopping and food.” She looked over at Suzette. “No offense meant to your cooking.”

  “None taken,” Suzette said cheerfully. “I'm not going to say no to dinner in a nice restaurant.” She shot Matt a meaningful look.

  “Got the hint the first time, babe.” He sounded more amused than annoyed, and my estimation of him went up.

  “I think I'll take a rain check,” I said.

  “What did I say?” Suzette brought over her own plate and sat down across from me. “Anti-social.”

  “Fine,” I said. “You want me to be social, I'll be social.” I stabbed a pancake more viciously than it deserved and glared at her.

  “Like you said, I get what I want.” Suzette grinned as she poured liberal amounts of syrup on her pancakes.

  “Yeah, yeah,” I mumbled. I knew what she was trying to do. She assumed that if I stayed around here for the second day in a row, I would spend the entire time moping about Lara. The fact that she was probably right annoyed me to no end.

  I insisted on driving separately so I could leave if I wanted to, but my trip to the resort wasn't a peaceful one. Suzette climbed into my car with a wide smile that told me I was going to spend the entire drive having a conversation with my sister I didn't want to have.

  “So,” she said as we started down the mountain. “You banged Denise last night.”

  “Really?” I gave her as mean a look as I dared while paying attention to the road. “That's what you want to talk about?” I sighed. “When did she tell you?”

  “She didn't. Well, not exactly anyway. Last night, I knew you were in the hot tub and she said she was going to check it out. She was gone for about a half hour and, this morning, the both of you looked very relaxed.” Suzette's eyes were dancing as she teased me. “I knew you couldn't resist.”

  “Kinda hard when she's got her mouth around my cock,” I muttered, annoyed.

  “She's on the swim team,” Suzette said, managing to say it with a straight face.

  “She mentioned that,” I said dryly.

  “Underwater blow-jobs are kind of her claim to fame around the campus.”

  I glanced at my sister. “And this is the same school I went to?” I shook my head. “A lot's changed in four years.”

  “Not from what I've heard,” she replied. “You were just a geek.”

  “Thanks.”

  “A hot one, based on pretty much every straight woman or gay man I've talked to, but still a geek.”

  “You know,” I said. “I've really missed these heart-to-heart talks.”

  She laughed at my sarcastic tone. “You know you love me.”

  I sighed. “I do.” She was right. I loved my parents, but the majority of it was obligatory. There were only two people in my life who had never let me down, had never done anything to make me question where I stood with them.

  One was Zeke Wesson, my best friend growing up. He'd been there for me through all of the crap with my mom and had been the one who'd protected me from bullies before I hit my growth spurt sophomore year. He'd been the popular kid, a jock and someone all the girls had loved. In school, I'd always been an outsider and he'd made sure I never completely drifted away. In return, I'd offered him solace from a shitty home life. He was the closest thing to a brother I had.

  The other person, of course, was Suzette. Our age difference didn't matter, and neither of us cared that we only shared one biological parent. She was my sister and I'd do anything to protect her. She was the same way. We looked out for each other, even after I'd moved out to go to school. It was always the two of us against our parents and against the world. Now that Suzette was getting older, I wondered if she and Zeke might end up together. I could honestly say I liked the idea. Some guys wouldn't want their best friend with their sister, but I thought it would be nice to have him be more of a part of the family and there wasn't anyone I would trust more with my sister.

  “Earth to Rylan.” Suzette poked my arm.

  “Ow.” I glared at her. “What was that for?”

  “I kept saying your
name and you weren't answering.” Her eyes narrowed. “You weren't thinking about Lara were you?”

  “No,” I answered honestly. “Just thinking about how you and Zeke are the only two people I could count on.” I glanced over at her as I followed Matt and Don into the parking lot. “You two get along, right?”

  “Sure, I guess.” She shrugged. “But I don't want to talk about your best friend. I want to talk about you and how you're doing.”

  “I'm fine,” I said, pulling into a parking space.

  “You're fine as in you got laid last night so things aren't looking quite so bad? Or fine as in I'm lying to you because I don't want you to see how hurt I am?”

  I glared at her. “How about fine as in I don't want to talk about my break-up or my sex life with my little sister?”

  She held up her hands in the universal sign for surrender. “Okay, okay, I get it. I won't ask about it again.” As she climbed out of the car, she added, “But if you're still that grumpy, maybe you need to get laid again.”

  I opened my mouth to say something smart, but she'd already closed the door and was heading over to where the others had parked. I scowled. I loved her, but sometimes I wanted to throttle her. Family. Go figure. I sighed and climbed out of the car before she could start sharing her observations with her friends regarding my need for more sex.

  As I got out of the car, I wondered if she was right. Once I'd gotten over the shock last night, I'd enjoyed myself. Denise had been enthusiastic and not shy about telling me what she'd wanted. But it had just been straight sex, pretty vanilla stuff. Maybe what I really needed was something more intense, something to let off a bit more steam.

  I pushed the thought aside and forced a smile. It wasn't like I was going to do anything about it right now. Maybe some other kind of physical activity would get my mind off of things. I wasn't a jock or anything like that, I never had been, but I'd always been good at skiing and I enjoyed it. I may have had my fair share of flings in the past, but I wasn't one of those guys who used skiing as an excuse to pick up women. I liked the athleticism of it.

  “So, what do you want to do first?” Misty asked, tossing her curls over her shoulder. “Cup of hot cocoa? Some shopping?”

  I refrained from rolling my eyes. “I'm thinking a quick run down a fairly easy slope to warm up.”

  “Up for some company?” Kristy asked.

  I looked over at Suzette who just smiled and waved as she and Matt headed for one of the stores. Abby and Don followed them. I glanced over to where I'd last seen Denise. If my sister had left me here with all three of her single friends, she and I were going to have a not-so-pleasant conversation.

  Denise, however, had her sights set on a pair of college-aged guys who were standing at the ski rental and checking her out. Apparently, Suzette had been right. Unless Denise was trying to make me jealous, she really didn't seem to care about last night.

  “Well,” Misty said, linking her arm through mine. “What do you say you come with us to rent some skis and then we'll take a couple passes together?”

  I gently disentangled my arm from hers. I wanted some time to myself, but I didn't want to be rude. The girls were a bit forward... okay, a lot forward, but they were nice enough and they were Suze's friends. I wasn't going to be a jerk to them for something like this.

  “How about you two catch up to me when you can.” I smiled at them both and hurried away before they could say anything else. A quick glance over my shoulder said they weren't following and they also didn't look pissed, so that was even better.

  When I reached the top, I breathed a sigh of relief. The air was sharp and cold, breaking through the haze that had been surrounding me. I'd chosen one of the medium slopes to get my legs under me again and I took it easy on the way down. It had been a couple years since I'd skied and I was pleasantly surprised at how quickly it came back.

  It didn't take me long to work my way back up to the more difficult slopes and I found myself enjoying the way the journey down helped clear my mind. I was able to focus on one thing at a time, letting my body move on instinct and muscle memory while my mind focused only on the next obstacle in front of me.

  I didn't know how long it would last, but I was going to take advantage of it for as long as I could.

  Chapter 5

  Four hours. That's how long I was able to keep myself from thinking about Lara and everything that had happened. Four glorious hours without anything in my head beyond the next turn of my skis or the tilt of my body. I didn't speak to anyone and no one spoke to me. I saw a couple women looking my way and a few guys too, but I kept my eyes on where I was headed and left it at that.

  I caught a glimpse of the others periodically as they took the easier trails, but I didn't approach them. I waved when one of them waved, but that was about it. As noon passed, though, I started to get hungry and knew I couldn't keep going without something in my stomach. Stopping, however, meant thinking again. I made my way back to the main lodge and ordered something to eat. By the time the food came, depression was already descending.

  I'd have to deal with it sooner or later, work through all those stages. Anger, denial, and the rest. I'd have to admit that things weren't going to be the same as they had been for the past few years. I'd have to start making new plans.

  But not today.

  I ate in sullen silence, unable to get the thought of Lara out of my mine. Suzette's previous statement about needing to get laid again and my own thoughts about the nature of my encounter with Denise all mixed and memories began to flash through my mind.

  Lara’s jade eyes glittered up at me. “Make sure you tie me up tight. I almost got free last time.”

  I tightened the knots around her ankles and her wrists, bending and contorting her body into a position that left her wide open and vulnerable. Most of the women I'd been with before had liked handcuffs or the occasional scarf. Not Lara. She wanted me to use rope to completely immobilize her.

  Once I was sure she wasn't going to get free, I went down on her, licking and sucking until she came. After the first, I added fingers, thrusting two into her hot, wet pussy without warning. She cried out and then writhed on my fingers as I pumped them into her. I licked and sucked every inch of her soft, delicious flesh, reveling in the sounds of her moans and cries. I made her come over and over again until she begged me to stop. But I didn't. I kept going until she finally said her safe word. Only then did I grant her respite.

  I closed my eyes. Fuck. I didn't want to think about that. I was already tense enough. I didn't need those memories to make things worse. It was too late though. No amount of skiing would clear my head now. In fact, if I was stupid enough to try to get on the slopes again, I'd probably ski myself into a tree and subsequent coma.

  I needed a new distraction away from this place. Get some work done. That would keep me from thinking about Lara.

  I waited until I was already in my car before I texted Suzette and told her I was heading back to the cabin. I figured that way, she couldn't try to talk me out of it. I wouldn't answer the phone or text while I was driving and she wouldn't be able to get to the parking lot before I pulled out.

  When I arrived at the cabin, I had three texts and a voicemail. She didn't sound angry, but she didn't sound entirely pleased with me either. The one thing I could tell, however, was that she was concerned. I shot her back another text letting her know I was okay and that I just needed to get some work done.

  It wasn't entirely a lie. Okay didn't mean good, and considering what had happened, I thought I was doing okay. And I was planning on doing some work.

  I brought my laptop into the living room, started a fire and tried to lose myself in the numbers and safety of coding. Instead, I found myself drawn back into memories.

  Lara was bent over the edge of the couch, her body quivering from the aftermath of an orgasm so intense that she'd almost passed out. Now, I was about to begin again. I twisted my wrist and the thin strips of leather cracked in the ai
r. This was her favorite flogger. It offered just enough pain to turn her on and the handle had been specially made to double as a dildo. I'd used it on her earlier and it was still slick with her juices. I tightened my grip and brought the leather down on her ass. My cock hardened as she whimpered.

  I shook my head. Not again. No more thinking. I shifted in my seat. My cock didn’t agree with my sentiment. It liked the idea of thinking about Lara and enjoying a bit of alone time.

  My hand stung but not as much as her ass had to. It was cherry red and she'd have a hell of time sitting for the next day or so, but her pussy was dripping wet.

  “Dammit,” I muttered. I'd been staring at this code for ten minutes and hadn't seen a thing.

  “Harder, baby. Fuck me harder.”

  I pounded into her as she struggled against her restraints. She knew she couldn't get free, but she liked knowing it and testing it. I tugged on the chains connected to her nipple clamps and she cried out. They had to be sore – I'd been playing with them all night – but she didn't cry off. If anything, she came harder.

  I put aside the laptop and sighed. There was no way I would to get work done like this. What pissed me off the most was that I wasn't even remembering all of the shitty stuff. It wasn't the memory of Lara being eaten out by our neighbor or any of the arguments we'd had over the past two years. It wasn't the times she'd driven me nuts or all of her annoying little habits.

  No, of course not. I was getting surround-sound and technicolor replays of our sex life. Which, now that I thought about it, had been strangely satisfying considering she'd informed me she was a lesbian. Then again, for all I knew, she'd either faked her orgasms or had been pretending I was some leggy brunette. I was willing to bet the latter, because she'd been the one who'd wanted the kinkier shit. If she'd just been going through the motions sexually, she wouldn't have cared as much. Right?

 

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